October 9, 2008

Worry or NOT to worry

I haven't been feeling that great since we've gotten back from Flagstaff. I had major headaches for 2 days after & the bottom of my ribs were killing me! Carlos thought it might be my muscles being sore from trying to breathe in. So the headaches went away (altitude change) but my rib/tummy area got worse. I still couldn't take a deep breath in, every time I even bent over slightly I was in pain, to lay down, to p/u Lele. I went to the dr on Monday. They did an ekg (turned out ok), I had a temp, did a breathing treatment, sent me for a chest xray. The dr was going to treat me for walking pneumonia. (I have zero cough too!)

The office called me yesterday, said I had a small density, a shadow on the left side. I need another view. I went right away & now I have to wait to hear back. WHAT does this mean? The nurse told me that some people get these 'nodules' & they come & go. They never turn into anything. Yeah, well me waiting here getting panicky, trying to breathe, wondering what the hell it is or NOT, & praying to God that it IS nothing, is a different story. I can't get upset in front of the girls, although when I got back from my xray they kept asking, Mom are you okay? Did they find what's wrong? I wish it worked that quick. The nurse said to continue my meds until I hear back. Why? The first xray came back that it wasn't walking pneumonia.

I'm hoping I get a call today. I've been up since 620am bcuz my cell rang. Some guy asking for John w/a 416 area code! Where is that anyway?!

Just a favor please, anyone reading this - please say a prayer for me. I know no one needs something like this to be the worse case scenario but I have so many other things wrong & take meds so why this now? I must be pretty strong, bcuz people say He gives you what he thinks you can handle. I feel I am but it seems to never end. This 'something wrong health-wise' & take meds for it! I'm not complaining, or doing a pity dance... I just never talk about all the meds or anything about it. Just Carlos hears it sometimes. (more Less than more often! I know that is backwards but it's true) Why cry or complain about something you have no control over? I just wish sometimes, that I didn't have to take meds to basically stay alive. The girls ask me from time to time, mommy - why do you have that pump? Well, this helps me stay alive bcuz my pancreas doesn't work. Then the questions just continue, if you didn't have it - you would die? I shouldn't EVER have this conversation my girls.

Okay, I'll stop there!! Enough with that! Until the nurse calls me back...

Carlos starts his sabbatical today! 2 mos! I know he's happy but then he has to start on this massive list of stuff he wanted to get done w/this house. I hope it all works out! It's FINALLY cooling off! In the early am & late pm anyway! It's still shorts & flip flop weather. I'm almost done the first book in the Twilight series. Yeah! It's getting real good but I can only read waiting to be called at the dr or while eating by myself! ha!

Graciella will be switching schools on the 21st! She'll have 3 wks off. She's happy. She was on the waiting list & we got a call last Thurs! Antonia will go back on the 15th. Hopefully, we'll get a call for her sooner than later! RE is changing too. I'll be doing it at home w/the girls. No more driving back & forth to church. We're happy about that. We can't be in 2 places at once w/Graciella getting out of school at 4pm & RE starts at 4pm. Not happening. I took my girls & Jeannie's 2 to see Beverly Hills Chihuahua. It was better than I thought it was going to be. It was a cute movie. The girls loved it.

I have to post pix & update the 98 Blue girls' blog asap!

Have a great day!


Diana Waite said...

OH, Julie! Dang! Know I'm praying for you!

Tina said...

Julie....I will definitely pray for you!

Michelle Devine said...

I am prying for you girl. I will think good thoughts. And know Im here for you;)